I have finished my first semester of college. Goodness, how time truly does fly! It seems like yesterday that I was dancing at my studio in LaGrange and going to Starbucks everyday this summer. But time has passed, and I have changed. Some alterations have been beautiful blessings, while others, I am realizing, have been changes to the person that I was, the person that God created me to be, that I have lost. One major thing being passion.
I used to be a passionate person. I still am, I like to believe. But my passion has shifted and squirmed around changing where it is directed. Now, I am passionate about life in general. I like to enjoy everyday, and I almost always do. But I seem to have lost my passion for things that I loved, with all of my heart, before. I have lost my passion for dancing, for people, and for a life lived for Jesus. Now, I haven't LOST IT lost it, I've simply misplaced it for a time. Looking back on this semester, I can so clearly see the dance classes where I did not give everything I had; where I was lazy, and did not try my hardest for the glory of God. I see how I have bypassed relationships with some people that could have been an influence or an encouragement to them. I see the days I fell asleep while praying, simply skimmed through a chapter in the Bible for my Bible time, and was thinking about what I was going to eat for lunch or what I needed to study that day during church.
I see and remember these moments-- these weaknesses and missed opportunities, and I miss my passion. I miss it, and I long, I desire, I YEARN to have it back and claim it as part of myself once again.
Showing posts with label dance. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dance. Show all posts
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Monday, August 8, 2011
{Monday Music}
Happy Monday!
This morning I got to babysit two precious little boys, one was three and the other was four, and they were so cute and funny. I love little kids so much, probably because I still am one. They are such a beautiful picture of God's love for us and how He looks upon us as His children. This afternoon I get to go to ballet class, two ballet classes actually, and I could not be looking forward to it more, especially since it has been two weeks since I've danced. I'm continuing to take ballet and contemporary classes at my studio here in LaGrange for the next two weeks until I leave for Belhaven on the 19th. It will definitely be nice to have these last two weeks with the beautiful girls I've danced with all these years. Here's some music for your Monday, just a few songs I've been listening to a lot lately. Enjoy!
This morning I got to babysit two precious little boys, one was three and the other was four, and they were so cute and funny. I love little kids so much, probably because I still am one. They are such a beautiful picture of God's love for us and how He looks upon us as His children. This afternoon I get to go to ballet class, two ballet classes actually, and I could not be looking forward to it more, especially since it has been two weeks since I've danced. I'm continuing to take ballet and contemporary classes at my studio here in LaGrange for the next two weeks until I leave for Belhaven on the 19th. It will definitely be nice to have these last two weeks with the beautiful girls I've danced with all these years. Here's some music for your Monday, just a few songs I've been listening to a lot lately. Enjoy!
Song starts at 3:12
Monday, June 13, 2011
A dream is a wish your heart makes
My mind has been constantly swirling with these thoughts for the past week. I've got to get them out.
-taye
I dream things that never were, and say "why not?"
Have you ever had a dream? Perhaps you have always longed to travel the world, or maybe you want to become a doctor. Or could it be that there is that one school you always wanted to attend, or is it that person you have always wanted to be with. For me, it is dance.
I began ballet when I was three years old, following in my big sister's footsteps, I suppose. Over the years I have added and dropped different styles- tap, Irish, modern, contemporary, jazz, pointe... the list continues. However, ballet has always had something so magical and captivating about it that constantly draws me in, causing me to love it the most out of all the styles I have tried. I have always loved ballet.
In eighth grade, I made the Senior Company at my dance studio, which came with a more demanding schedule, and a higher level of commitment. I suppose it was then that I decided that I wanted to continue to pursue dance after high school. I continued to grow closer to the Lord during high school, and I began praying about my future. . .was dance what He was calling me to do?
Turns out, it was. He has blessed me with the ability and desire to dance, and I yearn to praise His name, not my own, with that gift. But there are a number of options to consider when one chooses to pursue dance as a career choice. Was I going to audition for companies or trainee programs straight out of high school, or should I major in dance in college? After months of discussing with my parents and praying for direction and guidance, I chose to major in dance at Belhaven University where I will head off to this August.
This past week, we had a guest teacher come to our studio and teach ballet and partnering classes everyday for three hours. He was a difficult, but enjoyable and knowledgeable teacher, and I got so much out of every minute of every class. I am not sure whether it was the fact that I had been off of dance for about three weeks before that, or whether it was just having a different teaching style to learn from, but whatever it was, I fell in love with ballet.
I fell completely, head-over-heels in love with ballet. It was not that I never loved it for the past fifteen years I have been taking it, putting countless hours and classes and rehearsals and performing, spending a large amount of my parents' money on tuition and summer intensives and pointe shoes; I loved it then, but I guess I was only in a mere infatuation with it for the past fifteen years. It was only this past week that I fell in love with it, realizing the extent of the desire of my dream.
Have you ever questioned whether or not you made the right decision? Every single day this week, I have been tossing the idea around in my head of whether or not I should be going to college in August. I have been struggling and crying and praying and questioning, debating myself in my own confused thoughts. But it is not a question of what I want. It is a question of what GOD wants for my life; what HE has had planned out for me since before I was even born. What does HE want me to do? According to HIM, have I made the right decision?
I am still in a bit of a confused, questioning, debating state of mind, but I have comfort and confidence in the fact that, for at least this coming school year, I am supposed to be a dance major at Belhaven University. In the fall of 2012, it is completely up to Him how my dream will grow.
-taye
I dream things that never were, and say "why not?"
Have you ever had a dream? Perhaps you have always longed to travel the world, or maybe you want to become a doctor. Or could it be that there is that one school you always wanted to attend, or is it that person you have always wanted to be with. For me, it is dance.
I began ballet when I was three years old, following in my big sister's footsteps, I suppose. Over the years I have added and dropped different styles- tap, Irish, modern, contemporary, jazz, pointe... the list continues. However, ballet has always had something so magical and captivating about it that constantly draws me in, causing me to love it the most out of all the styles I have tried. I have always loved ballet.
In eighth grade, I made the Senior Company at my dance studio, which came with a more demanding schedule, and a higher level of commitment. I suppose it was then that I decided that I wanted to continue to pursue dance after high school. I continued to grow closer to the Lord during high school, and I began praying about my future. . .was dance what He was calling me to do?
Turns out, it was. He has blessed me with the ability and desire to dance, and I yearn to praise His name, not my own, with that gift. But there are a number of options to consider when one chooses to pursue dance as a career choice. Was I going to audition for companies or trainee programs straight out of high school, or should I major in dance in college? After months of discussing with my parents and praying for direction and guidance, I chose to major in dance at Belhaven University where I will head off to this August.
This past week, we had a guest teacher come to our studio and teach ballet and partnering classes everyday for three hours. He was a difficult, but enjoyable and knowledgeable teacher, and I got so much out of every minute of every class. I am not sure whether it was the fact that I had been off of dance for about three weeks before that, or whether it was just having a different teaching style to learn from, but whatever it was, I fell in love with ballet.
I fell completely, head-over-heels in love with ballet. It was not that I never loved it for the past fifteen years I have been taking it, putting countless hours and classes and rehearsals and performing, spending a large amount of my parents' money on tuition and summer intensives and pointe shoes; I loved it then, but I guess I was only in a mere infatuation with it for the past fifteen years. It was only this past week that I fell in love with it, realizing the extent of the desire of my dream.
Have you ever questioned whether or not you made the right decision? Every single day this week, I have been tossing the idea around in my head of whether or not I should be going to college in August. I have been struggling and crying and praying and questioning, debating myself in my own confused thoughts. But it is not a question of what I want. It is a question of what GOD wants for my life; what HE has had planned out for me since before I was even born. What does HE want me to do? According to HIM, have I made the right decision?
I am still in a bit of a confused, questioning, debating state of mind, but I have comfort and confidence in the fact that, for at least this coming school year, I am supposed to be a dance major at Belhaven University. In the fall of 2012, it is completely up to Him how my dream will grow.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Word Wednesday
Well, I am officially done with the dance year. It feels so strange, but I will still be at my studio until I leave for college in August, so it's not going to change too much until then. Church was awakening tonight, for me at least. Our previous youth minister spoke tonight instead of our current one, I love to listen to him speak, God really uses him. It's interesting to see how God speaks differently through different people. Anyway, I was just really reminded of the intensity of the cross and the depth of my sin and also salvation. Another thing I was reminded of that I am constantly in need of a reminder is how much and how incredible God's love is for us. How after we beat, scourged, whipped, slapped, spit on, and mocked Jesus Christ, what he asked in return was, "Father forgive them". . . how ridiculous is that? That is how intense God's love for us really is. Here's some of Luke to finish off your Wednesday.
-taye
And as they led Him away, they seized one Simon of Cyrene, who was coming in from the country, and laid on Him the cross, to carry it behind Jesus. And there followed Him a great multitude of the people and of women who were mourning and lamenting for Him. But turning to them Jesus said, 'Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for Me, but weep for yourselves and for your children. For behold, the days are coming when they will say, "Blessed are the barren and the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed!" Then they will begin to say to the mountains, "Fall on us," and to the hills, "Cover us." For if they do these things when the wood is green, what will happen when it is dry?'
Two others, who were criminals, were led away to be put to death with Him. And when they came to the place that is called The Skull, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on His right and one on His left. And Jesus said, 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.' And they cast lots to divide His garments. And the people stood by, watching, but the rulers scoffed at Him, saying, 'He saved others; let Him save Himself, if He is the Christ of God, His Chosen One!' The soldiers also mocked Him, coming up and offering Him sour wine and saying, 'If you are the King of the Jews, save yourself!' There was also an inscription over him, 'This is the King of the Jews.'
One of the criminals who were hanged railed at Him, saying, 'Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!' But the other rebuked him, saying, 'Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.' And he said, 'Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.' And He said to him, 'Truly, I say to you, today you will be with Me in Paradise.'
It was now about the sixth hour, and there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour, while the sun’s light failed. And the curtain of the temple was torn in two. Then Jesus, calling out with a loud voice, said, 'Father, into Your hands I commit My spirit!' And having said this He breathed His last. Now when the centurion saw what had taken place, he praised God, saying, 'Certainly this man was innocent!'
-taye
Luke 23:18-47 (ESV)
"But they all cried out together, 'Away with this man, and release to us Barabbas'— a man who had been thrown into prison for an insurrection started in the city and for murder. Pilate addressed them once more, desiring to release Jesus, but they kept shouting, 'Crucify, crucify Him!' A third time he said to them, 'Why, what evil has He done? I have found in Him no guilt deserving death. I will therefore punish and release Him.' But they were urgent, demanding with loud cries that He should be crucified. And their voices prevailed. So Pilate decided that their demand should be granted. He released the man who had been thrown into prison for insurrection and murder, for whom they asked, but he delivered Jesus over to their will.
And as they led Him away, they seized one Simon of Cyrene, who was coming in from the country, and laid on Him the cross, to carry it behind Jesus. And there followed Him a great multitude of the people and of women who were mourning and lamenting for Him. But turning to them Jesus said, 'Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for Me, but weep for yourselves and for your children. For behold, the days are coming when they will say, "Blessed are the barren and the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed!" Then they will begin to say to the mountains, "Fall on us," and to the hills, "Cover us." For if they do these things when the wood is green, what will happen when it is dry?'
Two others, who were criminals, were led away to be put to death with Him. And when they came to the place that is called The Skull, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on His right and one on His left. And Jesus said, 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.' And they cast lots to divide His garments. And the people stood by, watching, but the rulers scoffed at Him, saying, 'He saved others; let Him save Himself, if He is the Christ of God, His Chosen One!' The soldiers also mocked Him, coming up and offering Him sour wine and saying, 'If you are the King of the Jews, save yourself!' There was also an inscription over him, 'This is the King of the Jews.'
One of the criminals who were hanged railed at Him, saying, 'Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!' But the other rebuked him, saying, 'Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.' And he said, 'Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.' And He said to him, 'Truly, I say to you, today you will be with Me in Paradise.'
It was now about the sixth hour, and there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour, while the sun’s light failed. And the curtain of the temple was torn in two. Then Jesus, calling out with a loud voice, said, 'Father, into Your hands I commit My spirit!' And having said this He breathed His last. Now when the centurion saw what had taken place, he praised God, saying, 'Certainly this man was innocent!'
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Bittersweet Goodbyes
Well, I’m about to leave in just a bit to go to Troup High for my last dance recital in LaGrange. It’s bittersweet. On one hand I have so many crazy memories and I love the company girls and my students so much that I hate to leave them all behind; yet on the other hand, I am so anxious and eager to move onto the next chapter of my life and dance with new people and new teachers and have new experiences.
Needless to say that as I get my makeup on and spray my hair to death, I am getting pumped for my Senior dance recital . . . the playlist?
• Florence + the Machine
• Mumford and Sons
• Ellie Goulding
• The Cinematic Orchestra
• John Mayer
• Snow Patrol
-taye
~Isadora Duncan
Needless to say that as I get my makeup on and spray my hair to death, I am getting pumped for my Senior dance recital . . . the playlist?
• Florence + the Machine
• Mumford and Sons
• Ellie Goulding
• The Cinematic Orchestra
• John Mayer
• Snow Patrol
- Coldplay
-taye
"If I could tell you that, I wouldn't have to dance."
~Isadora Duncan
Monday, May 9, 2011
Monday Music
I'm sipping a chai tea latte while I write this, and I made an A on my math final this morning. My Monday is beginning pretty well I'd say. This is my last week of dance at my studio here in LaGrange; our recital is tomorrow, senior dinner is on Thursday, and competition is on Sunday, after that all I'm doing is summer classes and then I'll be off to college in August beginning a new start on dance. Anyway, here's some music for your Monday.
-taye
-taye
I am not really a big country music fan, but I do love two country groups/artists: Taylor Swift and Lady Antebellum. This is Lady A's newest song.
(Song starts at 18 seconds)
This song is really ringing true this weekend and the start of this week. I'm continually realizing my incredible need for Christ, as well as my need for prayer and time in the Word. I can clearly see the difference in my life, the way I speak and act toward others, when I am and when I am not consistantly doing these things and getting that time with God that is oh so necessary and vital to my life.
"When I cannot stand I'll fall on You"
We sing this one every now and then at Encounter (my church's contemporary service) it's repetetive, but passionate. I cannot help but cry out to the Lord sometimes to just fill me up with Himself, so that my life will look less like me and more like Him.
"For to me to live is Christ and to die is gain."
Philippians 1:21
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Moment of happiness
I love spring break. Today, I slept until 11:33, watched Gilmore Girls while drinking coffee, made super chocolaty chip scones and thoroughly cleaned mine and my mom's cars. It's times like this when I have nothing pressing that needs to get done that I get a lot of thinking done. Here are some thoughts.
-taye
Moment of Happiness
Sometimes, there are those sudden moments of complete happiness that spring upon me from out of no where. Right now is one of those moments. Nothing extremely significant or exciting has occurred today, it has been mostly a day of laziness: sleeping late and doing nothing productive. In these random happy moments there are a few things I want to do and yet I do not know which I want to do most:
Shout to God in joy with a giant smile stretched across my mouth
Stare up at the stars in awe and in wonder, with no particular thoughts to fill my mind
Make coffee (after all, that is always an excellent solution to any feeling)
Write a song. Or write a million songs that will all turn out to be the best ever (although most songs I ever write turn out horribly with no music to accompany them, so I typically do not go this route)
Just dance (no, not the Lady Gaga song) whether to music or not, I just want to let it all go and dance what I feel for once
And yet none of those actions seem to express the immenseness of this feeling of joy. The best part about it, however, is that it has no apparent cause. It is a feeling of utter freedom and yet one of a sense that I belong to something perfectly. One that I am loved; one that I am making a difference; one that I am fulfilling my purpose, even if I do not always know clearly everything that purpose includes. It is a feeling that I am exactly where I need to be, doing exactly what I need to be doing, and heading to exactly where I need to go. This moment of happiness is one of the best feelings in the entire world.
-taye
Moment of Happiness
Sometimes, there are those sudden moments of complete happiness that spring upon me from out of no where. Right now is one of those moments. Nothing extremely significant or exciting has occurred today, it has been mostly a day of laziness: sleeping late and doing nothing productive. In these random happy moments there are a few things I want to do and yet I do not know which I want to do most:
Shout to God in joy with a giant smile stretched across my mouth
Stare up at the stars in awe and in wonder, with no particular thoughts to fill my mind
Make coffee (after all, that is always an excellent solution to any feeling)
Write a song. Or write a million songs that will all turn out to be the best ever (although most songs I ever write turn out horribly with no music to accompany them, so I typically do not go this route)
Just dance (no, not the Lady Gaga song) whether to music or not, I just want to let it all go and dance what I feel for once
And yet none of those actions seem to express the immenseness of this feeling of joy. The best part about it, however, is that it has no apparent cause. It is a feeling of utter freedom and yet one of a sense that I belong to something perfectly. One that I am loved; one that I am making a difference; one that I am fulfilling my purpose, even if I do not always know clearly everything that purpose includes. It is a feeling that I am exactly where I need to be, doing exactly what I need to be doing, and heading to exactly where I need to go. This moment of happiness is one of the best feelings in the entire world.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Little Ballerinas
So, the other day, I was watching my best friend teach her dance classes for homeschoolers at our church...the program is called Steps of Faith. I was technically supposed to be writing a speech for my class, but instead I wound up writing this...it's titled "Little Ballerinas."
Little Ballerinas
As I sit here and observe a ballet class full of little girls, I can see the joy of the Lord. Though some of the girls lack passion, I see some that are as passionate about dancing as I am, though obviously in a different way. Even the disobedient ones, once they begin skipping I start to see glimpses of joy in their laughter and the giant smiles on their faces.
Alongside the joy, I see Christ’s love—the love that He has for His children. I see it from the way the young teacher praises each little girl as she finishes a step, regardless of whether it was executed correctly or not. I also see His love in the way one little girl hugs another when she came into class upset. Also accompanying the joy and love, I see patience. I see patience as the teacher waits calmly with a fake smile on her lips for each girl to join her in a straight line to do chassés.
Aside from the joy, love and patience, I see so much more. In the eyes of each little girl I see something different. In the eyes of the newest student, I see eagerness to learn and drink everything in. In the eyes of the angelic looking little girl with the blonde curls, I see pure happiness. The eyes of the perfectionist: determination, the eyes of the youngest: freedom. And in the puffy eyes of the little one who began class with tears and sniffles, I now see the epitome of a little girl having the time of her life.
Little Ballerinas
As I sit here and observe a ballet class full of little girls, I can see the joy of the Lord. Though some of the girls lack passion, I see some that are as passionate about dancing as I am, though obviously in a different way. Even the disobedient ones, once they begin skipping I start to see glimpses of joy in their laughter and the giant smiles on their faces.
Alongside the joy, I see Christ’s love—the love that He has for His children. I see it from the way the young teacher praises each little girl as she finishes a step, regardless of whether it was executed correctly or not. I also see His love in the way one little girl hugs another when she came into class upset. Also accompanying the joy and love, I see patience. I see patience as the teacher waits calmly with a fake smile on her lips for each girl to join her in a straight line to do chassés.
Aside from the joy, love and patience, I see so much more. In the eyes of each little girl I see something different. In the eyes of the newest student, I see eagerness to learn and drink everything in. In the eyes of the angelic looking little girl with the blonde curls, I see pure happiness. The eyes of the perfectionist: determination, the eyes of the youngest: freedom. And in the puffy eyes of the little one who began class with tears and sniffles, I now see the epitome of a little girl having the time of her life.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)